You’re both wearing rings already. How does that work?
Honestly, we didn’t expect to need to answer this one, but it has been asked a lot. Many different-sex couples have also begun having both partners wear a ring during the engagement period — a change in the times reflective of a world where people increasingly want to value both partners equally in the relationship. Just as these different-sex partners do, we will take the band off before the ceremony, and then we will put it back on again during the ceremony. Magically, it will change from being called an engagement ring to a wedding ring.
Is the wedding indoors or outdoors?
Our plan/hope is for an outdoor ceremony with an indoor/outdoor cocktail hour, followed by an indoor reception. Our plan for inclement weather is fully indoors at the same venue location.
Do you expect weather?
Yes. The problem is that weather might be a sunny, warm day, or it might be a snowy day. Lots of options for weather, but we haven’t had a day in our life without it. It’s usually warming up this time of year, so we’re hoping for the former.
FWIW: May 10, 2024 had a low of 40°F and a high of 76°F. The locals would consider this patio season.
What should I expect from the ceremony?
There will be seating regardless of indoor/outdoor. We aren’t having a religious ceremony, so relative to many, expect something on the shorter side.
What’s the dress code?
The dress code is Cocktail attire.
Okay, but what did “cocktail” mean to you when you picked that dress code?
The etiquette guides would place “cocktail” attire on this scale (least to most formal):
Casual >>> Festive >>> Semi-Formal >>> Cocktail >>> Formal/Black-Tie Optional >>> Black Tie >>> White Tie
We like fancy. We have fun looking fancy. We dress up for date nights when we’re the only ones around to notice. That makes us feel good, so we will be on the formal side of cocktail attire, without likely straying into black-tie. (Unless you’re really trying to show us up, avoid the tux.)
Our main concern is that you dress in something that makes you confident enough to bust a move on the dance floor. We would love to see y’all in suits and fancy dresses, but the most important thing to us is that you are there and having a good time. We do hope people lean into a fancy night out, but if you know us, you should know by now that if it just really isn’t your vibe or its going to require buying something you’ll only wear once, we’d much prefer you find the fit that feels you and show up ready for some fun. Join us in whatever makes you feel fancy and ready for fun!
Are there gender neutral bathrooms?
For as inclusive as Minneapolis usually is, there’s an archaic law requiring gender-specific bathrooms for certain businesses which many wish they didn’t need. The venue assures us that while the signs are there to comply with code, it is safe for you to use the bathroom you identify with. (And to our non-binary and/or trans guests: we think we’ve only invited decent people, but if anyone gives you guff tell either groom, and we will swiftly have security remove them from our event.)
Will there be a shuttle to/from the venue on the night of the wedding?
There are no current plans for a shuttle the night of the wedding. (That could change, so check back closer to the event.) Find the best option for your situation here.
Do you have a block of rooms reserved at a hotel?
Yes — look up more about the blocks over here.
What hotel is the couple staying in?
We will likely be staying at The Marquette. Find recommended hotel blocks, with discounted rates at a few other nearby options here.
Is this a child free wedding?
No! If your kiddo is invited, their name is on the invite! We know kids often have the energy most needed to keep the dance floor alive, and we really do look forward to celebrating with them! We just ask them to try and save some of that energy for the dance floor, if possible. At one point or another each of us has been the kid who wouldn’t cooperate with our parents’ wishes, but best as you’re able, we do just respectfully ask for kids to remain seated during seated times and/or minimally distracting during three key moments we care most about: ceremony, formal meal portion (speeches), and first/parent dances.
Auntie Rae Rae will have a surprise come dance time for the kiddos who tried their best!
Is there a place to share photos of the day (and surrounding events)?
Yes! Go to the-gayest-agenda.com/join to share memories with us. You can also view photos other guests have uploaded on the bottom of the page!
My mailing address changed. How can I be sure the invite, etc. goes to the right spot?
Update your mailing address here! (And thanks for saving the couple legwork!)
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